got these scars on the same ground
by stealingthestars
Summary: The mission always leaves something behind: an imprint on their skin, callouses on their fingertips, a heavy, empty silence that bleeds from the walls and settles into the air. And on nights like these, they can feel it. Even as they peel off their sweat-soaked suits and scrub the blood and dirt from their hands, they can feel it.


_"feels like this could be forever tonight, break these clocks, forget about time."_

 _~ a.m., one direction_

* * *

On nights like these, the apartment is quiet.

There isn't a lot to say, after all. The mission always leaves something behind: an imprint on their skin, callouses on their fingertips, a heavy, empty silence that bleeds from the walls and settles into the air. And on nights like these, they can feel it. Even as they peel off their sweat-soaked suits and scrub the blood and dirt from their hands, they can feel it.

It's why, when Dick stumbles into the kitchen, he makes four cups of tea instead of one. It's why, even though Artemis could bandage the gash on her forearm just fine, she lets Zatanna's gentle fingers care for it instead. It's why Roy doesn't retreat into his room immediately after they get back, why Kaldur leaves the mission report unfinished on the counter, why M'gann and Conner sit a little closer than strictly necessary and no one really minds. It's why they all linger in the living room for just a few moments too long.

"Perhaps we should all get some rest," Kaldur says after some time has passed, his hands wrapped tightly around the mug that Dick had pressed into them. His voice and eyes are tired, and the mission has left them all exhausted, but he makes no move to go to his room. None of them do. Maybe they aren't ready to fall asleep yet.

Maybe they just don't want to be alone.

"Can we-" Wally hesitates, and then scrubs at his eyes and says slowly, "Is it okay if we just, stay here?"

Kaldur nods, and a little bit of the tension in the room seems to ebb away. Then Zatanna mumbles a spell that summons a pile of blankets, and they're clambering onto the couch together, squeezing to fit and laughing softly as Roy and Wally tousle for the best spot.

(And Wally wins, but only because Roy lets him.)

M'gann curls up against Conner, one hand resting in Artemis's. "Maybe we could play a game?" she suggests, because it doesn't take long for it to become clear that none of them will find sleep any time soon.

"Not truth or dare," Wally says immediately. "Every time we play, Dick forces me to relive some embarrassing story."

"You just have so many great ones, it would be a shame to let them go to waste," Dick taunts, settling his head into Wally's lap. The speedster retorts with a none-too-gentle tug on his dark hair, and Dick scowls and swats at his hand but doesn't move away. Kaldur chuckles a little, and Zatanna laughs; this is how it has always been, and always will be, between the two of them, something so simple and easy that somehow it makes everything a little lighter. The brightness of their banter is almost contagious.

The magician pauses in thought. "What about Never Have I Ever? The um, non-alcoholic version?" she offers.

"I don't see how that's any less revealing than truth or dare," Artemis says, with a pointed look at Wally, and shrugs, "but let's do it. Can I go first?" They all nod and almost instantly regret it when a catlike grin flickers across her face, highlighted in the silvery moonlight that comes in through the window. "Never have I ever had powers."

The five collective groans are joined by her pleased laugh and Wally's indignant cry of, "Really, Arty?"

Dick just cackles and even Roy chuckles at the others' expense as all the super-powered teens reluctantly lower a finger.

"You're gonna pay for that," Zatanna says, her voice dangerously low. She's always true to her word.

* * *

The sky has already started to lighten when their laughter begins to taper off, when the delirious high from the night slowly starts to fade away. As it leaves, the exhaustion sinks back into their bones, the hollowness in the air makes itself known again. It's suddenly harder to ignore.

"Kal?" M'gann inquires hesitantly, receiving a soft hum of response, "What happened at the mission yesterday...those kids-" she swallows tightly and clutches Conner's arm a little tighter. She doesn't-can't-finish. She doesn't have to.

"There was nothing more that could have been done, M'gann," Kaldur responds, and his voice is heavy and solemn enough to make her wish she hadn't said anything. But maybe they all need it, the quiet reassurance from their leader that it's okay. Maybe he needs it to.

And so Roy says, his voice somewhat strained, "Sometimes...sometimes you just, can't save everyone."

They've all heard it a million times before. From their mentors, from each other. That doesn't dull the blow any, though; it still rings in the air, sharp enough to sting in how truthful it really is.

For a moment, it's painfully quiet.

Then Wally looks at him with bright, earnest green eyes, his hand still carding through Dick's hair. And his voice is tired, but there's hope buried somewhere underneath. "We keep trying though, right?"

Slowly, the archer swallows against a tight throat. "Yeah, kid," he says, and the barest trace of a smile crosses his lips. "We keep trying."

* * *

 **oh my god it's been so long since i've posted anything and none of my wips were working out at all. but i had the idea for this one really recently, and as soon as i started writing it all just came pouring out. it's shorter and kind of different than usual, but i hope you liked it!**

 **i'm considering doing a series of one-shots similar to this, where they all have an apartment together and go to the same high school and roy is a permanent member of the team. what do you guys think?**

 **and finally, the title of this work is from one direction's song "a.m." which was actually kind of the inspiration for this entire piece. it's a beautiful song, you guys should really check it out.**

 **thanks for reading everyone!**

 **~ umana**


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